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A CD’s Shoe Fetish. Not what…but why ?

My shoe fetish, not what, but why!  In our male lives, we share almost nothing of our CD history or current gender thoughts, and even in the company of transgender friends, much, but not all, tumbles out. The advantage of a Blog like this is to benefit our fellow TGs with some of those ‘secret’ thoughts..but anonymously.
        In my case, crossdressing started with an intense interest in girls way back in the 7th grade just as they started wearing bras and edged into puberty. And a focus on their shoes: in those days, shiny loafers and kneesocks or simple black flats and stockings. As I grew up (maybe !), my home-grown fantasy was to wear those shoes and stockings in isolation…just to masturbate. Years later I bought designer heels for my first wife…classic laceups or black and white spectator pumps…which she’d wear for sex…and, then, I did too…but they didn’t fit…and she was repelled by it all. As the years went by, the initial (shoe) fetish spread up my body toward total dressing…at first alone, then in social settings…and, finally, it morphed into a second, female mentality. The initial fetish persisted as part of femme me…and in a very specific way: a fondness for flats, retro laceup pumps and boots, slings, classic Gucci loafers, black and white spectators…no patent…or suede…no open toe pumps…no strappy sandals. As with most of us, I hardly had any fashion education, either from  girlfriends or other GGs, from female family members, or fashion magazines. So the unanswered questions are two fold: why a shoe fetish in the first place, and, secondly, why the specific styles I chose…and those I rejected. What makes the subject intriguing to me is that the original shoe fetish was what started my gender journey toward total crossdressing and femme expression. Is a narrow fetish how many of us start ? Or do other ladies-in-waiting first experience total femme feelings in their minds…not in their dress ?   I don’t know the answer; do you ?
Thanks Annabelle

About cdinyc2012

Crossdressers International Incorporated is a member-supported adult transgendered group focused on support and social activities, serving the New York City metropolitan area. CDI is qualified as a non-profit corporation under section 501(c) 7 of the federal tax code. In the beginning, as stated in “Our History”, our founders envisioned CDI to be an all inclusive, welcoming haven for those seeking to come to terms with their transgendered nature. While the majority of our members and friends identify as cross dressers, we have served as a refuge for those who identify as transsexual, drag queen, and gender queer as well. Historically, our focus has been on the m-f crossdresser/transgendered. However, we do welcome those who identify from the f-m experience. While many of our members are long time comfortable with their transgender identity, we have never lost sight that our basic mission is to stand ready to provide a welcoming sanctuary for those who are taking their very first steps of self discovery. We know from our own experience that this can be a frightening time for those who have been closeted. The fear of loss of family, friends, employment, and standing in ones community can be overwhelming. And all for merely being gender different. Even today in our changing times the fear of discovery, ridicule, and worse can be terrifying for those who are attempting to safely practice their gender expression. WE are here for you. We make no claims of being “expert” in any matters, yet through our individual and collective experience we are highly knowledgeable. CDI also serves as a resource center where we can direct you to qualified professionals should that be desired. In short, we believe that groups like ours help to save lives. Sometimes just a welcoming smile and spoken kindness can be enough to assure someone (and maybe that’s you!) that they are not alone. For whatever reason each of us were dealt this hand from birth. For years many of us have considered it a curse. At CDI we believe that once liberated from the isolation of the closet that in time you will come to see your own transgenderism as a “gift”. So whether experienced or not, come - We welcome you, and we exist for you!

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