It seems we’re coming up in the world in terms of status, girls. So many of us – myself included – worry about being accepted in a public place whether we’re grocery shopping or out at a club. We put our efforts into looking our best and we pride ourselves on it. Sometimes we may get asked about our status, and it’s usually quietly done with no muss or fuss. However, nobody likes being asked directly, especially in front of friends.
When going out with two friends – male and straight, both – a girl came up and asked quite plainly if there was a female amongst us. I should probably use inverted commas because that’s about the end of it. A friend was sincere enough to say in a very direct way, “Yes: Claire.” She nods and says, haltingly, “Okay, Claire: you have a knot in your hair.” She proceeded to groom me like an orangutan despite being informed I had a brush in my bag and tell me how she’d worked in theatre and knew that wigs can be a hassle and how much respect she supposedly has for me. “Gee. Thanks,” is about as civil a thought I had as might be printed while she detangled – and decurled – my hair.
However, it turned out nobody felt it was embarrassing for me. Rather, the young lady – to be polite – left only to be followed by her husband’s sincere apologies for her “embarrassing herself like that.” It seemed everyone agreed. “Who does that?” My friends, who in fact only know me as Claire, even agreed she made an utter fool of herself and wanted to know why she asked what she did because “it showed how ignorant people can be.” That’s what friends are for, but my next thought was about the people seated around us.
Nobody likes being asked out loud if they’re female. Evidently, it seems this opinion is held in general. The young man to my left, of whom I did not have acquaintance, expressed a very encouraging sentiment, especially for someone whose wife was next to him. “Why would she ask you that instead of say hello? If you’re a woman you’re a woman aren’t you? How is that her business? I’m surprised you took it sitting down.”
At a place where you’re the only TG, which is normal, we’re often under the assumption that men think we’re not women of any sort at all. Perhaps it’s more accurate to say the public either doesn’t care if we exist or not, may simply not be attracted to a girl of our status, or has come to accept that, in the end, we’re women aren’t we? It’s nice to be treated that way. Let’s pray it’s contagious