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Gender Awakenings – Claire

It seems we’re coming up in the world in terms of status, girls. So many of us – myself included – worry about being accepted in a public place whether we’re grocery shopping or out at a club. We put our efforts into looking our best and we pride ourselves on it. Sometimes we may get asked about our status, and it’s usually quietly done with no muss or fuss. However, nobody likes being asked directly, especially in front of friends.
When going out with two friends – male and straight, both – a girl came up and asked quite plainly if there was a female amongst us. I should probably use inverted commas because that’s about the end of it. A friend was sincere enough to say in a very direct way, “Yes: Claire.” She nods and says, haltingly, “Okay, Claire: you have a knot in your hair.” She proceeded to groom me like an orangutan despite being informed I had a brush in my bag and tell me how she’d worked in theatre and knew that wigs can be a hassle and how much respect she supposedly has for me. “Gee. Thanks,” is about as civil a thought I had as might be printed while she detangled – and decurled – my hair.
However, it turned out nobody felt it was embarrassing for me. Rather, the young lady – to be polite – left only to be followed by her husband’s sincere apologies for her “embarrassing herself like that.” It seemed everyone agreed. “Who does that?” My friends, who in fact only know me as Claire, even agreed she made an utter fool of herself and wanted to know why she asked what she did because “it showed how ignorant people can be.” That’s what friends are for, but my next thought was about the people seated around us.
Nobody likes being asked out loud if they’re female. Evidently, it seems this opinion is held in general. The young man to my left, of whom I did not have acquaintance, expressed a very encouraging sentiment, especially for someone whose wife was next to him. “Why would she ask you that instead of say hello? If you’re a woman you’re a woman aren’t you? How is that her business? I’m surprised you took it sitting down.”
At a place where you’re the only TG, which is normal, we’re often under the assumption that men think we’re not women of any sort at all. Perhaps it’s more accurate to say the public either doesn’t care if we exist or not, may simply not be attracted to a girl of our status, or has come to accept that, in the end, we’re women aren’t we? It’s nice to be treated that way. Let’s pray it’s contagious

About cdinyc2012

Crossdressers International Incorporated is a member-supported adult transgendered group focused on support and social activities, serving the New York City metropolitan area. CDI is qualified as a non-profit corporation under section 501(c) 7 of the federal tax code. In the beginning, as stated in “Our History”, our founders envisioned CDI to be an all inclusive, welcoming haven for those seeking to come to terms with their transgendered nature. While the majority of our members and friends identify as cross dressers, we have served as a refuge for those who identify as transsexual, drag queen, and gender queer as well. Historically, our focus has been on the m-f crossdresser/transgendered. However, we do welcome those who identify from the f-m experience. While many of our members are long time comfortable with their transgender identity, we have never lost sight that our basic mission is to stand ready to provide a welcoming sanctuary for those who are taking their very first steps of self discovery. We know from our own experience that this can be a frightening time for those who have been closeted. The fear of loss of family, friends, employment, and standing in ones community can be overwhelming. And all for merely being gender different. Even today in our changing times the fear of discovery, ridicule, and worse can be terrifying for those who are attempting to safely practice their gender expression. WE are here for you. We make no claims of being “expert” in any matters, yet through our individual and collective experience we are highly knowledgeable. CDI also serves as a resource center where we can direct you to qualified professionals should that be desired. In short, we believe that groups like ours help to save lives. Sometimes just a welcoming smile and spoken kindness can be enough to assure someone (and maybe that’s you!) that they are not alone. For whatever reason each of us were dealt this hand from birth. For years many of us have considered it a curse. At CDI we believe that once liberated from the isolation of the closet that in time you will come to see your own transgenderism as a “gift”. So whether experienced or not, come - We welcome you, and we exist for you!

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