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-Gender Awakenings: ” In Between Time”. (from “Crossdressers’ (CDI) Monthly” , December, 1999)

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-Gender Awakenings: ” In Between Time”.
(from “Crossdressers’ (CDI) Monthly” , December, 1999)
Every CD has two sides: the original male persona with its responsibilities of job and family. Then the femme side, both the physical cosmetic “passable” part..and then the psychology of being a girl..letting go of the aggressive testoterone mind set..feeling rather than always acting. (“What’s the score ? Who won the game What’s the bottom line ?”).
But there’s a third side too. I’ve discovered it, and girls I know have confessed they experience it too. It’s what I call “In Between”. You’re on your way to the CDI apartment. You’ve left your male life; you’re carrying your female persona in a duffel bag. But you aren’t dressed yet.. You start to think about the maleness you’ve just left at home or at work and the female persona you’re about to assume. But you’re neither. You’re in Between.
I get quite philosophical about the male things I’ve just left that i love: the people, the events, the male lifestyle and, yes, the parts I want to let go too. As the subway pulls in and as I get closer to the apartment, I start to think about female me, what she likes, who she likes, and why she does it. Even as I dress, still In Between, that valuable time puts the two mes in perspective.
As the time comes to slide out of heels and stockings and to apply cold cream to my pretty face, the same thing happens in reverse as I transform from female to male.
It’s time well spent the In Between. Time to reflect on who and what’s most valuable..and why ! As though your life isn’t complicated with two personas, now it’s time to think about the Three Faces of You !

About cdinyc2012

Crossdressers International Incorporated is a member-supported adult transgendered group focused on support and social activities, serving the New York City metropolitan area. CDI is qualified as a non-profit corporation under section 501(c) 7 of the federal tax code. In the beginning, as stated in “Our History”, our founders envisioned CDI to be an all inclusive, welcoming haven for those seeking to come to terms with their transgendered nature. While the majority of our members and friends identify as cross dressers, we have served as a refuge for those who identify as transsexual, drag queen, and gender queer as well. Historically, our focus has been on the m-f crossdresser/transgendered. However, we do welcome those who identify from the f-m experience. While many of our members are long time comfortable with their transgender identity, we have never lost sight that our basic mission is to stand ready to provide a welcoming sanctuary for those who are taking their very first steps of self discovery. We know from our own experience that this can be a frightening time for those who have been closeted. The fear of loss of family, friends, employment, and standing in ones community can be overwhelming. And all for merely being gender different. Even today in our changing times the fear of discovery, ridicule, and worse can be terrifying for those who are attempting to safely practice their gender expression. WE are here for you. We make no claims of being “expert” in any matters, yet through our individual and collective experience we are highly knowledgeable. CDI also serves as a resource center where we can direct you to qualified professionals should that be desired. In short, we believe that groups like ours help to save lives. Sometimes just a welcoming smile and spoken kindness can be enough to assure someone (and maybe that’s you!) that they are not alone. For whatever reason each of us were dealt this hand from birth. For years many of us have considered it a curse. At CDI we believe that once liberated from the isolation of the closet that in time you will come to see your own transgenderism as a “gift”. So whether experienced or not, come - We welcome you, and we exist for you!

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